A peek at my musical past

Since we are getting ready to have a yard sale this weekend, I've been digging through a lot of crap that, up until this point, has been enjoying a peaceful, undisturbed existence in the basement. I just came upon a box of cassette tapes, and immediately knew I'd struck gold. There is no way I'm selling these. You see, I still have a tape player in my 2002 Hyundai, so I've just uncovered hours of rockin' tunes for my morning commute.

Here is a sampling of what I've found:

• Queen, The Show Must Go On and Bohemian Rhapsody (single)
• Guns n' Roses, G N' R Lies
• Guns n' Roses, Yesterdays (single)
• Poison, Look What The Cat Dragged In
• Poison, Every Rose Has Its Thorn (single)
• Def Leppard, Love Bites (single)
• Skid Row, Skid Row
• Ozzy Osbourne, Time After Time (single)
• Vanilla Ice, To The Extreme

Look at this treasure trove of awesome. Oops, I spy NKOTB!

The discovery of these tapes tells me three very important things about myself: first, and most disturbing, I have a heretofore undiagnosed hoarding issue. These tapes are from circa sixth grade, which was 18 years ago. Why do I still have them in my possession? (The only answer I can think of is that I must have visited the future at some point in my youth, realized that I would be driving a hilariously outdated car at age 30, and made the decision to save the tapes so that I wouldn't get bored on long road trips.) The second important realization is that my financial management skills at age 12 were simply nonexistent. Why did I have so many singles? Didn't I realize that for a few dollars more, I could have the entire album? And finally, if I do say so myself, I was a cooler middle schooler than I ever gave myself credit for. If I had been born a few years earlier, I would have been a full-on groupie, and I'd have the illegitimate children by Bret Michaels to prove it (btw, I'm praying for you, Bret). 

The only thing I can't really explain is the Vanilla Ice tape, simply because I fancied myself too cool for "rap" back then. There is a strong possibility that this tape was bought many years later, perhaps even at a yard sale. Now some may dismiss the musical stylings of Mr. Ice, and to them I say, have you even listened to Havin' a Roni? No really, have you? Because you totally should.


Note: I couldn't find a video of just the song, so you'll just have to watch this asshole lip-syncing. P.S. What's a roni?